Back to Dating! By the other Debra
Not the dating you think!
I just ended a 10 year relationship with my hairdresser and I am speed dating to find a new one!
I consider myself a loyal person. I have been married for almost 38 years, I have friends from my childhood and I still use the same toothpaste I did as a little girl.
I am so faithful to the service people I frequent that my family worries that I may start a college fund for their children, and I almost never switch products because I am not tempted to stray.
Before moving to Israel 24 years ago, I had been going to same hairdresser, Steven for years and years. I religiously followed him whenever he moved locations. He felt like a friend and was for sure a confidante. He cut my boys hair as well and graduated to being a part of our family. Ever attentive, he knew how to zero in with just the right compliment to make me feel beautiful, an all-around great stylist.
During my first year in Israel, I travelled back to the States several times and my first stop was always to Steven for a haircut and a catch up. I never imagined that I would find someone in Jerusalem, but I did.
Somehow my friend and I discovered Joe, and he was the next best thing to Steven. He had the same pleasant disposition and was instinctively talented. Unfortunately Joe became ill and passed away. We were so loyal that even though the haircuts weren’t quite right, even one side much shorter than the other, we were steadfast and stuck by him. I felt as though the other hairdressers in the salon were just “chomping at the bit” to inherit Joe’s clients. One hairdresser even said to me that he had been waiting for me to go to him because he was the better of the two. Well, you can be sure that I didn’t go to that one, I was heartbroken and left the salon. I was a nomad, trying different salons every 6 weeks, sometimes I would return a second time but nothing seemed right until I went to Doni. Everything just clicked. He did a great job cutting my hair and had a wonderful disposition. There began our long relationship. I referred my friends to him. He even opened the shop the morning of my son’s wedding just for me. He left his wife in the hospital after giving birth to his son. That’s love.
A hairdresser is a pseudo therapist.
Nora Ephron believed that blow drys are much better for you than therapy and she used to get her hair blown 3 times a week. You literally let your hair down and share things while the dryer is blasting, some that you may not even share with your best friend. We trust our hairdressers more than our spouse. But when that trust is betrayed there goes the relationship. My hairdresser betrayed me when he gossiped about a friend of mine to another customer while I was sitting right there. That was it. I let him finish my hair, paid him knowing that this was my last time and I walked out of the shop. I felt betrayed and I have to leave. This feels like divorce with the similar emotions, anger, loss, betrayal and the fear of moving forward.
Here I am, weeks later and I need a haircut. What to do? I almost feel like I am “having an affair” as I consider going somewhere else. I almost made an appointment with Doni for protection in case I didn’t find someone. I asked friends of mine but still wasn’t ready to take the leap, until today. I am desperate. I swam, rushed out of the pool without blowing my hair and started walking home. I passed a salon on the way and something just clicked, the hairdresser was available and I was inspired to try it. I had known about her through a friend from Australia who had been going to her for years whenever she was in town, and she looks fantastic. This lovely woman washed my hair and then asked if she could just “fix” a few things. The next thing I knew she had totally restyled my hair with a fresh new look.
When I told a friend the story she called this “the rebound haircut”. So I am going to “play the field” for a while. I will give this hairdresser a second chance but am not ready to commit just yet.
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